Well, if anyone read my last post, you can already tell that I failed. And I was gonna try again today, but I decided to walk. I got to the freeway, and I walked there for some time, and then the police came and drove me home.
And I was in an argument just now, with my ex. I got mad, and told her that I hoped her life would crumble, and just go to hell. I regret that now. I hope that she lives a good life. Finds the perfect man, maybe even have a child. And then I hope he leaves her. I hope he makes her happy, and then makes sure all that happiness is turned against her, and I hope it hurts. I hope she'll look back in her life, and think something like "Why did I leave him?". I loved her. I still do, but I can't do anything anymore. I still have the friends I met through her, and I hope they will always be my friends. And I will keep the promises I made. At least I am going to try. I can't see myself in the future. I really can't imagine how it'll be in a year or so. Well, this is it for now.